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Pick up lines should perhaps better be thought of as icebreakers. There is no secret set of words that will have you reeling the ladies in. You can, however, use a more effective approach than tired old pickup lines.

Why Pickup Lines Don’t Work

Pick up lines don’t work for a very simple reason: They’re more for guys making jokes with one another than for actually meeting women. While you might get her to laugh at pickup lines after you’ve broken the ice, if you use any number of cheesy pick up lines, you’re more likely to get an eye roll than a phone number.

“Don’t I Know You?”

The best way to introduce yourself to someone is by remembering that you know them from somewhere. The second best way is to pretend you think you do. The more specific you can be about this, the more believable it will be. Ask the person if they are Jane Smith or John Doe, or if you met them at a party a real friend of yours threw. This will make it seem more like you actually have a clue who they are.

“I Like Your _______.”

No, don’t compliment her body parts. Instead, show yourself to be a person with style by complimenting someone’s shoes, shirt, hat or anything else you actually like. Statements like these always work better when they are true, so find something you like, then head in and use it to break the ice.

“You Look Bored.”

Often times when a person looks bored it’s because they are bored. You can cheer a man or a woman up by approaching them, telling them they look bored and asking them how you make them not bored. Have something entertaining up your sleeve like a joke, a round of drinks or a game of pool to make this pickup line a home run.

“How Hard Would It Be To Get You To ______ With Me?”

No matter if this is dance, shoot pool or grab a drink, offering someone the option to do something with you is always a great way to gauge initial interest right off the bat. Ask them how hard it would be to get them to do something with you. It allows them to say yes or no, without having to actually say “no.” It’s a lot easier for a person to say that getting you to talk a person into something would be hard than it is for the person to flat out say no. Further, you can easily tell by the tone and manner of the response if there is any interest there at all.

“I Invented Post-Its.”

In the film Romy & Michelle’s High School Reunion the titular characters go to their high school reunion with tales of inventing Post-It Notes. While untrue, the anecdote provides an excellent lesson in pickup lines. While making something up about yourself is usually a bad idea, starting off with a fun and quirky story about yourself is a great way to break the ice. Whether it’s the time you got arrested in Mexico because of mistaken identity or your years spent as a minor character on Full House, the interesting and weird stories about your life make great icebreakers.

Jokes

One excellent way to catch a someone’s eye is with a good joke. You should have a joke or three in your romantic quiver to fire off as icebreakers. Approach them as if you are going to tell a story, then transition into the joke. Women love a man with a sense of humor and men often complain there aren’t enough funny women in the world. Leading with a joke not only gives you something to talk about, it also gives you a quick gauge of compatibility. Someone who doesn’t like your jokes might not be someone you can go the distance with — or even a single night.

“Heard Any Good Pick up Lines Lately?”

Stand the pick up line on its head. Ask if someone has heard any good pick up lines lately. This short-circuits the “pick up line,” allowing you to maximize most people’s distaste of the pick up line for your own personal gain. Your intended target will have no idea they just fell prey to one of the savviest pick up lines in the world when you ask them this.

Using Pick up Lines

The best pick up line is anything you can say with confidence. It’s not so much what you say but how you carry yourself when you approach a strange person in public.